Today I had a particularly ugly situation to resolve. Someone on the fringes of my life got a little over-amourous, then got very possessive, then jealous, then nasty and then started to exhibit violent behaviours towards me. I decided that enough was enough two weeks ago and started the process of having their behaviour quashed legally.
Let me make my thoughts on the subject of violence absolutely crystal clear. I believe that violence of any kind towards another human being is never, ever okay. Furthermore, violence towards women is extremely abhorrent and this person needed to learn that in Australia, their behaviour is illegal, intolerable and inappropriate.
Bullying, harassing, intimidating, menacing, threatening and stalking behaviour is NOT OKAY!
This person was asked nicely by several people to leave me alone - including by me, five times. They chose not to heed the warning and today they found out what happens when I am threatened - you get an unpaid day off, in court, accompanied by a rather dimwitted lawyer.
This sojourn to court was quite possibly the most stressful five hours of my life. Worse than the two breast cancer scares I've had. Worse than knee and shoulder surgeries. Not as bad as having shingles, glandular fever AND recovering from knee surgery at the same time - but it was definitely up there.
I kept as calm as possible. I read yoga magazines. I breathed deeply. I chanted mantras in my head. I shuffled the 87 pages of evidence I'd taken with me to court. I couldn't find my headphones and nearly had a category five meltdown over that before leaving for court, so music was out, but I got chatting to other applicants and then met a nice Court Support Network lady who supported me for the whole process.
To cut a long story short, good triumphed over evil, despite the respondent and his equally dimwitted lawyer trying to screw me over on a condition that I had very kindly compromised over. No way was I going to let that happen, so I let them have it, via the Magistrate.
The Magistrate was in no mood for the respondent's trackpants and runners outfit (he got the thrice over, I nearly peed my pants -seriously, how disrespectful turning up to court looking like a bum off the street) the repeated disrespectful and nasty looks in my direction and his constant interruption shenanigans, so he let the respondent know in no uncertain terms that if he plays up, he's in big trouble.
The respondent now can't try anything stupid or commit any of his previous behaviours towards me or have anyone else try it either. If he does, he gets arrested, goes back to court and gets a filthy great fine, possible jail time and a criminal record. Good job I say.
I got a nice thick wad of papers and a 12-month reprieve from the respondent's blatant stupidity. The respondent may finally get a clue, or perhaps not, but seriously - I really hope they learn the lessons I tried to teach them. Society at large should now be a better place because this person needed to learn that this behaviour IS NOT OKAY!
Just because carrying on like a rancid pork chop towards women is deemed acceptable by some people in the lower levels of society, it doesn't mean it's okay in general or that it will be accepted, tolerated or approved of by the majority of society. There are serious crimes against women every single day in some countries, like acid attacks, dowry murders, gang rapes, murders, severe beatings, setting fire to your wife, etc. I didn't want to end up another crime statistic.
I hope this person leans how to behave properly and learns that the word no, means NO! I hope they learn that when they are asked or told to leave someone alone, that it means that you stop calling, texting, visiting, starting, stalking, harassing, intimidating, following and otherwise annoying that person.
I went through this so that this person could learn how to behave properly, to protect myself and to protect other women from being subjected to the blatant stupidity of actions and words that I suffered for almost four months thanks to the uneducated, unwise and foolish behaviours of this person.
If you've got an over-amourous admirer, be careful. There's a fine line between good and evil, don't let them cross it.
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