Virtual Vision Boards

I stumbled across a virtual vision board creation tool the other night when an email came through from my yoga studio. The director had made up a virtual vision board of all the cool stuff we'll be enjoying next year, from salt therapy to workshops and early morning classes. She'd then stuck the picture in the newsletter.

Aha! What a fab idea - much as I love the physical creation, I wanted something "quick and dirty" to pop up at home - aka I want it now, so I'm making a virtual board right this second! Instant gratification is a dangerous thing, but here's what I plan to work on in 2014:

Basically, 2014 will be the year that I slow down and take more time for myself, after the crazy whirlwind of 2013 has left the building. 

2013 has been a year of immense personal growth, professional growth and figuring out what I need from life, with a side of knowing very well now what I don't want from life. 

Needs and wants are different - I need peace and quiet, I want a happy life. I need to avoid drama and evil pond scum. I want to have nice, happy, positive people around me. I need to let go of all the baggage of 2013 and I want to grab 2014 and give it a giant hug.

Wants and needs aside, I have managed to keep Harold the happy houseplant alive and kicking for several weeks, along with the aloe vera and the green plant with spines and a red throat. I also bought another five succulents which are still alive too. The cat is still kicking after eight years and I've still not put back on a single kilo of the weight I've spent five years leaving behind.

Despite it's immense highs and lows, up and downs, inside outs and back to fronts, 2013 hasn't been too bad a year. I'll reflect a little further on New Year's Eve, but for now I'm happy just being me, right here, right now. 

No means NO!

Today I had a particularly ugly situation to resolve.  Someone on the fringes of my life got a little over-amourous, then got very possessive, then jealous, then nasty and then started to exhibit violent behaviours towards me. I decided that enough was enough two weeks ago and started the process of having their behaviour quashed legally.

Let me make my thoughts on the subject of violence absolutely crystal clear.  I believe that violence of any kind towards another human being is never, ever okay. Furthermore, violence towards women is extremely abhorrent and this person needed to learn that in Australia, their behaviour is illegal, intolerable and inappropriate. 

Bullying, harassing, intimidating, menacing, threatening and stalking behaviour is NOT OKAY!

This person was asked nicely by several people to leave me alone - including by me, five times. They chose not to heed the warning and today they found out what happens when I am threatened - you get an unpaid day off, in court, accompanied by a rather dimwitted lawyer. 

This sojourn to court was quite possibly the most stressful five hours of my life. Worse than the two breast cancer scares I've had. Worse than knee and shoulder surgeries. Not as bad as having shingles, glandular fever AND recovering from knee surgery at the same time - but it was definitely up there. 

I kept as calm as possible. I read yoga magazines. I breathed deeply. I chanted mantras in my head. I shuffled the 87 pages of evidence I'd taken with me to court. I couldn't find my headphones and nearly had a category five meltdown over that before leaving for court, so music was out, but I got chatting to other applicants and then met a nice Court Support Network lady who supported me for the whole process. 

To cut a long story short, good triumphed over evil, despite the respondent and his equally dimwitted lawyer trying to screw me over on a condition that I had very kindly compromised over. No way was I going to let that happen, so I let them have it, via the Magistrate. 

The Magistrate was in no mood for the respondent's trackpants and runners outfit (he got the thrice over, I nearly peed my pants -seriously, how disrespectful turning up to court looking like a bum off the street) the repeated disrespectful and nasty looks in my direction and his constant interruption shenanigans, so he let the respondent know in no uncertain terms that if he plays up, he's in big trouble.  

The respondent now can't try anything stupid or commit any of his previous behaviours towards me or have anyone else try it either. If he does, he gets arrested, goes back to court and gets a filthy great fine, possible jail time and a criminal record. Good job I say. 

I got a nice thick wad of papers and a 12-month reprieve from the respondent's blatant stupidity. The respondent may finally get a clue, or perhaps not, but seriously - I really hope they learn the lessons I tried to teach them. Society at large should now be a better place because this person needed to learn that this behaviour IS NOT OKAY!

Just because carrying on like a rancid pork chop towards women is deemed acceptable by some people in the lower levels of society, it doesn't mean it's okay in general or that it will be accepted, tolerated or approved of by the majority of society. There are serious crimes against women every single day in some countries, like acid attacks, dowry murders, gang rapes, murders, severe beatings, setting fire to your wife, etc. I didn't want to end up another crime statistic. 

I hope this person leans how to behave properly and learns that the word no, means NO! I hope they learn that when they are asked or told to leave someone alone, that it means that you stop calling, texting, visiting, starting, stalking, harassing, intimidating, following and otherwise annoying that person. 

I went through this so that this person could learn how to behave properly, to protect myself and to protect other women from being subjected to the blatant stupidity of actions and words that I suffered for almost four months thanks to the uneducated, unwise and foolish behaviours of this person. 

If you've got an over-amourous admirer, be careful. There's a fine line between good and evil, don't let them cross it. 

E Tu - Stand proud; Kia Kaha - Say it loud

I had to head off to court today to obtain legal recourse against someone on the periphery of my life  (and they shouldn't even be that close to me!), who really does need to make some serious changes to their attitude, life and behaviour. 

This person needs help and compassion, but also needs to learn that they cannot bully, intimidate and harass people. I believe that this person has anger issues which need to be addressed and that they should seek the help they need. 

My position on this matter is that violence towards women (or anyone else) is never okay, no matter whether it is emotional abuse, mental abuse, or physical abuse. The respondent to my complaint believes that it is okay to behave in an aggressive, intimidating and harassing manner towards me and so therefore got a shock when they were called into the local police station to be served with legal documents telling them to leave me alone or they will be arrested and charged. 

For the final time, I will not back down, I will not be intimidated, I will not be silenced, I will not be bullied, I will not be treated like a stray dog in the street and I will not tolerate my human rights being violated. This person really does need to get a nice, fun, happy life of their own and stop trying to be a part of mine.

I'm not going to go into too much more detail on this, except to say that although my afternoon court session was a traumatic experience (and the first of two court sessions), it has empowered me and most certainly has not scared me off pursing this matter further.

People must learn that violence of any kind, particularly towards women, IS NOT OKAY! 

I'm getting down off my soapbox now, but I do want to clearly state that I will not stop with this legal action until I achieve the desired outcome - which is for this person to leave me alone and let me get on with my wonderful, fabulous life - without them in it! 

If it takes a court order to achieve that outcome, then so be it. 

Unresourceful Drama and the Law of Attraction

This past week has been one of the most challenging since returning from Malaysia. There have been some pretty darn challenging times over the past 8 weeks - mega stress, death threats, abusive people, way too much drama and unnecessary amounts of other people's self-cherishing impacting my life - but this past week saw a particularly unpleasant situation that has been almost a mainstay of daily life for the past three months, finally require resolution.

I'm not going into details as it's done with now, but let's just say that the other person involved really does need to take a good, hard look at their actions, speech, thoughts and life - and then make some fast and positive changes. They simply will never be happy if they do not change. I hope they get over themselves and take action to find some inner peace and strength to stop behaving in an unresourceful way.

I regret nothing - life is too short. I have forgiven myself for my part in the situation and I have forgiven them for their part in it also. I have no issue with getting over myself, or taking action when I need to because I'm heading down the wrong path at the fork in the road. Life is not about regretting the things you've done, the decisions you've made or the actions you've taken along the path. Life is about pulling your little socks up and getting on with living.

But - always, always, always trust your intuition - if it tells you something or someone isn't quite right for you, please listen to it and act accordingly. That's called trusting and backing yourself. Never be afraid to ask for help. Never think you have to cope on your own and never question your intuition. 

As some clever person once said, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting a different result. I've learned lessons from this situation, so it is time they did too. They need to move on with their life and I wish them happiness, kindness and a happy life moving forward.

On the subject of onward and upward, I submitted both my NLP Practitioner Assessment Workbook and my Basic Law of Attraction Practitioner exam and essay this past week for final consideration and grading. Yesterday morning I received the awesome news that I have passed the Basic Law of Attraction Practitioner course and am now a fully-fledge Basic Law of Attraction Practitioner! Woohoo!  I hope to have confirmation of passing the NLP Practitioner course early next week.

Amazing things happen when you disconnect the idiot's lantern (aka the TV) and focus on reading, learning and personal growth and development. I challenge you to spend one less night each week watching TV and instead, pick up a book, find an online course, learn something new - just do something other than being a brainwashed turnip on a sofa! TV is like evil pond scum - it lurks under the surface, ready to suck you in and mess with your mind. Less than ideal conditions for inner peace and outer strength, don't you think?

I've found a fantastic site called Daily OM where you can purchase a variety of awesome courses on all kinds of topics at very affordable prices. There's Ayurveda, Feng Shui, 21 day life detoxes, meditation, Buddhism and lots more. I've enrolled in a few to keep my mind busy on the nights when I don't have yoga and so that I can keep on learning new skills!

I believe in lifelong learning, CAN-I (constant and never-ending improvement), developing my mind, embracing my spirit and improving my body. If you do too, please do something small right now to get off your butt and on the road to a better life, filled with goals and dreams and purring kittens and fluffy bunnies. Or whatever.

Namaste.

Green tea - the last hippie bastion has finally fallen

Hell has finally frozen over. I'm drinking green tea and I am enjoying it. 

In my search to re-create moments from my amazing Malaysian adventure, I've been seeking out Lemongrass and Ginger tea, in the vain hope that I can find one that tastes like the amazing one that I had at Alun-Alun spa in Langkawi. So far, no good.

I bought a box of Lemongrass and Ginger tea in Tesco in KL but that doesn't taste like Alun-Alun's tea which I'm sure was black tea. Apparently the one I bought was green tea. Slight fail.

Green tea always tasted like crap before. Well, maybe not crap exactly. Perhaps more like rancid soy milk with stalks of gosh-only-knows-what steeped in it. Regardless, no good. Until now.

I bought a box of green tea with Lemon and Lemongrass in it one day at Safeway here in Melbourne and thought "well, stuff your ginger then". This tea also does not taste like Alun-Alun's tea, but guess what? I'm loving it.

As I'm sitting here typing this anecdote with a glass of green tea on the desk next to me, I'm feeling rather pleased with myself. Green tea is not the evil pond scum juice I remember it being years ago. Sure, it's not coconut water or Malaysian iced coffee, but it's pretty good. And it's not coffee. It's hydrating, relaxing and good for me. It's full of antioxidants and health benefits. It will help me flush out toxins. And so on and so forth.

What has this got to do with life coaching? Well, remember my quest to just say yes, have more fun, try new stuff, get over myself and have more adventures? Yes? Good! This was a bit of an adventure and I'm glad I got over myself, just said yes, tried something new and I am now enjoying green tea.

Baby steps eventually lead to a marathon. That is all.