Another Christmas bites the dust

Christmas has been and gone, and thank God for that. I hate Christmas. I hate the blatant over commercialism, the expectations, the expense, the nonsense and the BS that comes with it. Fotunately for me, I live 2400km away from the family drama in NZ and don't have to go anywhere or do anything for Christmas. Well, except enjoy Christmas lunch at the local RSL with the neighbours, come home, fall asleep on the sofa and get up and go to the gym to burn it off.

A lot has changed in the past few weeks so here's a major update:

• I'm shadow teaching Zumba classes to get experience.
• I've changed jobs. I'm now running a gym and have about 14 staff reporting to me. Not bad for someone who's apparently too stupid to be taught how to do a bit of admin which I'd already taught myself and have vast experience in doing! It's further from home but easier to get to.
• I've finally figured out that workcover owes me money for travelling to and from physio and the surgeon, so I've put in a claim.
• I'm now doing some corporate health check consulting work on Thursdays which pays well but I have to pay tax on the earnings, less expenses of course.
• I've reached sales leadership with Avon but it's really time consuming and I'm getting over it. It's too much work for so little reward.
• I'll be an Independent Intimo Consultant as of January. It's less time consuming, way more rewarding and much better commission.
• I'm going to do more Zumba instructor trainings in 2012.
• I'm going to FILEX as event crew - work half, get the other half free - and I get to go to Beto's master class!
• I'm going blonde.
• I've been to Ballarat and Geelong this month and will be back to both in Jan for the corporate health consulting work. Geelong continues to grow on me, Ballarat not so much.

The shoulder is still munted and I still can't swim properly. I think I'm about 10% impaired. The impingement is still impinged, the movement is still limited and it still gets grumpy. I'm still having physio twice a week - mobilisation, acupuncture and soft tissue therapy. I'm still very frustrated with the situation and considering legal action for damages as I've lost thousands of dollars in race entry fees and coaching and in having to pull out of races.

Aside from all this, not much else is happening. I'm trying to get into a bit of a routine so I can get my exercise back into a routine but it hasn't been going smoothly. Stupid Christmas, stupid New Year. That said, I'm heading to the gym shortly for a workout because I feel all fat and horrible. Now that I'm not on public transport, the incidental exercise is diminishing and I'm getting complacent.

I need to make time for myself to exercise and I will make time for myself to exercise because if I'm not running at 100% nothing else in my life will either.  I'm not eating too badly, it's just about getting organised, getting a routine going and sticking to it.

So without further ado, I'm off to smash myself.

Frozen Berry-Granola Squares

Frozen Berry-Granola Squares

Seared Chicken with Maple glaze

Seared Chicken with Maple glaze Yum!

heads, shoulders, knees and toes..

Yes, it has been a little while since my last post. I had my Dad over from NZ for ten days, was meant to go to NZ myself but got ash clouded, I've had a sinus infection for three weeks, my shoulder is still bung, I've been working crazy hours and I'm now doing some direct sales to make up for all the free time left from not doing any Ironman training!

Yep, been a bit busy.

Okay, shoulder update time.

Shoulder:

Still bung. Have been off for cortisone shot and ultrasound. Shoulder has not one but two tears - a 2.5cm partial in my supraspinatus at the anterior and mid articular fibres, and a 3mm wide full-thickness tear component of the mid fibres with a grumpy bursa and associated pain, suffering and bursitis.

Waiting for MRI report and surgeon visit.

Shizzle.

Hell in a handcart

A few things have happened since June, most of them were less than ideal. But it's not all bad news - some great stuff has happened too. So, let's get the bad stuff out of the way first.

I've had to pull out of both Ironman 70.3 Yeppoon and Ironman NZ. I've had an ultrasound on my shoulder at the end of June which found two tears in my supraspinatus, one MAJOR and one a little less significant. At the same time, a doctor injected some cortisone which flared for two days and since has settled the aching and most of the pain first thing in the morning.

Since that needle episode, I've seen a shoulder specialist and was told I need an MRI to help him assess the extent of the damage and then surgery to reattach my supraspinatus back to the head of my humerus with plastic anchors - and that with 4-6 weeks in a sling and then 4-6 months before I can swim properly, it is curtains for Ironman NZ next year.

I was gutted. I immediately declared three days of mourning, which turned into seven. I cried, I was angry, I tried bargaining and denial, then I just accepted the fact that I can't do my dream race in March, the one I've been training for, oh well, HOW LONG, yeah, only for THE LAST TWO BLOODY YEARS!!!!!

I've spent a huge amount of time, money, blood, sweat and tears on getting to IMNZ 2012 and sadly someone decided to close the road to glory. I'm still angry - that may not change for a while, but I'm being constructive and doing constructive things about it like smashing the few weights I can still do with my upper body like theraband curls and rows and pulldowns. I haven't been able to walk for the past two days, BTW :-)

So now for the good news.

I'm off to do Zumba Basic 1 Instructor training on 19 August. I finally had the opportunity to do it, and so I'm doing it. A friend bought me new dance sneakers for a birthday present, and I can now fit into all the pretty dance pants I bought in Sydney in 2009. Woohoo!  I have to get strapped up and not do anything overhead with the bad arm/shoulder but that's okay.

I'm moving house next Friday to the unit right next door to my current one. It's $50 a week cheaper and has brand new paint and if the carpet guy ever turns up today, it will have brand new carpet too. Score!

What else...?

I'm going to teach Zumba to make some extra money, which was going to pay for my dirty Triathlon habit but now it's to help pay the bills while I'm off after surgery and to replace the time I was spending doing my tri training. Clearly there's no need for four hour bike rides when your surgeon has banned you from your bike, so I needed a gap filler.

Between the few hours a week of training and work, I'm doing okay - it's starting to take my mind off the fact that the next 9 months are going to be really, really challenging. My attitude is better than a week ago and although I cried when I emailed the IMNZ race office to withdraw, I found out yesterday that there's going to be an Ironman in Melbourne from 2012! Yay! Maybe I can do 2013 or 2014...and I don't have to necessarily go to NZ to do my first race. I will still do NZ, it may still be my first one but we'll see.

So, if you want a personal trainer, want a Zumba class near you or want a new weights program, give me a yell!

17.7kg to go!

Seven is my favourite number, and this week I hit a big milestone on the scales. I've now dumped something like 15.8kg since December last year and over 25kg in total since moving to Aussie. Now that's exciting! I've only got 17.7kg to go to my original goal weight of 70kg, and to be honest, I'm thinking I could go a wee bit lower.  I dunno, I'll see how I look and feel in 7.7kg time and then make a decision.

What I'm trying to avoid is looking as skeletal as when WW set my goal weight at 62kg about ten years ago. On my frame, that means virtually no muscle - not ideal when you're a triathlete and personal trainer. I don't want to lose my muscle, I've spent the past two years acquiring it and I've worked bloody hard to get it! I can definitely be leaner - although size 16 stuff is starting to hang off me, and that's because of all the tri training (biking specifically) and general running around I do all day and half the night now. 

Because I work four nights a week, I'm running around or standing when I used to sit on my fat white butt on the sofa, in front of the TV. It's hard to stuff junk down your own throat when you have awesome clients to train, work in a gym and don't get dinner breaks on the shorter shifts. I'm eating the bulk of my fuel for the day before 1pm, which means that I have plenty of time to burn it off. 

And, I don't eat junk anymore. Sure, I'll have my fortnightly fix of Lindt Milk Balls (I buy the three pack on payday and that's IT for the next two weeks), and very occaisionally I'll have a Kebab (which I bring home, microwave the meat to get the fat out of it, never have fatty sauces on, and have them hold the cheese so I can add my own low-fat cheese when I get home). Heck, it's about substitution. Why eat one bought something with a billion calories and ten billion grams of fat, when you could make it yourself and have possibly a bigger serving with half the fat and calories?

And on the subject of calling this exercise "weight loss" - I don't like the connotation of saying I've "lost" x kg. I have no intention of ever finding it again, so I'm going with "dropped" or "dumped" or "dropkicked". I don't want to go back out looking for that flab! I don't want it to find me either. I'm hardly going to go and file a missing person's report for 25kg - it's never coming back!

In other news, my shoulder is still causing me major issues. My physio told me on Friday that she wants to send me off to a sports doc for cortisone injections, and that I'll be lucky to do Yeppoon. Far out. I've had a chat with my coach and the best option we can come up with is to go find a good sports doc and get a second opinion on what they think is wrong and what events they think I can do. Until then, I'm back on dry land. 

Boo hiss.

Bodythin percentage

I've had a huge incineration of bodyfat this week. I've dropped 1.5%! All this cycling and mag training has definitely made a huge dent in the vat of fat. Plenty more of the same should produce similar results - obviously it will all be at a higher intensity going forward, but I'm looking forward to more of the downward shift away from fatness!

The next couple of weeks will be very stressful. By the 10th of June I'll have worked 17 days straight without a day off as I've picked up a Tuesday long shift in membership sales with a view to dropping that nasty Friday morning! I just can't train when I'm that tired, it doesn't work!

My Dad is coming to stay for ten days from the 8th of June, sharing my poky little one bedroom unit. I haven't shared a house with anyone for that long in about ten years, and let's face it, it is going to be challenging. My kitchen is barely big enough to swing a cat's whisker in, let alone the whole cat. My bedroom is just big enough for a double bed and not much else. I'll be on a mattress in the lounge, sleeping next to my mag trainer. Hopefully my boss will still be able to lend me said mattress, or it's going to be airbed city.

On top of this, I'm training about 14-16 hours a week and I just found out today while on the mag trainer that the property manager wants to do an inspection next Monday. Yeah thanks, universe, just what I need on top of being a struggling person, amateur triathlete and busy personal trainer! As if I don't have enough to stress about. The housework had to be done anyway, but with Dad and the property manager coming it has to be extra super duper spotless but lived in.

I've just climbed out of the pool after another 200m of pain. I nearly did the last 100m non-stop, just to see what my shoulder would do (aside from bitching and moaning that is) but it wouldn't cooperate more than 50m and then only breaststroke. It seems to be getting slightly easier to swim and less painful which is good but it still hurts like hell. Hopefully after physio this week I'll be able to increase the distance maybe to 250m or even 300m. 

The shoulder continues to bitch and moan very loudly for a couple of hours after swimming, and it whines something chronic first thing in the morning. I think it's the cold, or the fact that I am sleeping on it a bit more. I have to - I'm a side sleeper, and sleeping on just one side isn't my idea of fun when there are two sides available. I'm trying to sleep kinda rolled back on that side so that I'm not crushing it but it doesn't really seem to make much difference. I refuse to sleep on my back and can't sleep on my front. So, I wait until I'm literally about to black out from tiredness and then go to bed.

I've done two training sessions already today - a hard hour on the mag trainer and then the 200 in the pool. Tomorrow it's a 2.5hr bike, Wednesday a run and maybe a tiny swim, Thursday a 1.5hr hard mag trainer session, Friday a 3hr bike, Sat a run, and Sun ride to and from work with a run off the bike. And then my training week starts all over again!

Right, off to work time so have a great day y'all.

Cold snaps and Km

The weather has been a bit daft for the past couple of weeks. On Sunday it was really warm, like "one jacket and no thermal top on under your shirt" warm. Last week was cold but slightly warmer than the week before. Today we've been hit by another cold snap, with bitey cold winds and big surf with showers and cold temps. I'm going to go for a run in the morning, so I can have a giggle at the surf and the waves crashing over the sea wall!

This is certainly not ideal riding weather - but I took a HTFU pill this morning and headed out anyway. I was wrapped up warm, my phone was inside two ziplock plastic bags, and I had money and my myki in case I needed anything! I figured if I got wet and blown around it would be just like riding in Auckland, and would be just like riding IMNZ this year! 

I took the train (well, trains) up to Hoppers and decided to ride the Federation trail back to Brooklyn, then ride on to physio, and then ride home. I figured it would be about two hours, but when I factored in the wind and the getting lost parts it was closer to three. I'm not sure where I went wrong - I followed the trail but apparently lost it somewhere. 

Next time I'll ride it in reverse, so I can get a clue as to where I went wrong! I was about 3km from Hoppers station before I think I lost the plot, but it could have been when I had to try and find another way across Old Geelong Road when I found the underpass was about two feet underwater!

I'd taken gels, an up and go energise, a small packed lunch and electrolytes with me, but it was so damn cold and windy that I forgot to do anything except drink. I had the up and go when I finally got to physio, slightly late. I stopped for five minutes on the way home to eat my chicken wrap and then came home for carbs - baked potato, a bowl of cereal with yogurt and milk, and a protein shake. 

It was after 4pm by the time I got home and I had to be at the club by 6pm for the weekly mag trainer session so I ate and went for a walk around the village. I came home, filled my bike bottles, got changed, watched a quick bit of TV and hit the club. The mag trainer session was harder than last week - 2mins solid race pace, 2mins tempo and then 1min flat out, followed by 2.5mins easy spin. We repeated this about four or five times, then hit the one legged cycling drills. I remembered to loll about on the floor and stretch but have just realised that I've forgotten my quads and calves!

Yesterday I tried to swim, being 0.25 of a 25m length. I forgot my cap but was in so much pain that I teared up my goggles. Epic Fail. Goodbye ironman.

Off to bed - well, off to stretch and then bed. More later - it's a big week and I'm tired and extremely sore after about 2hrs of riding today!

Where's your head at?

Since my tumble off the treadmill last month, I've honestly not felt like training most days. It hurts like hell no matter what I do, being injured is tiring in itself, and there was a small case of bung shoulder, major bruising and a festy knee. I've been banned from swimming for the past few weeks, I could barely walk for two weeks, I didn't have enough flexion in my left knee to bike for a week or so, and my shoulder still frigging hurts. 

I re-read some old blog posts and noticed a disturbing pattern. Whenever I get injured, I lose the plot. It takes a while to get the plot back - and for me to really want to train again. Identifying this is good, because I can talk it over with head coach and the whipper snapper, to find some solutions to my silly pattern around being injured and then the resultant slacking.

I really need to HTFU and get on with it. I really want to do NZ - it's been a dream for years. I currently only half want to do Yeppoon, which is worrying. It's a C race, which is probably accounting for half the state of mind around wanting to pull the pin on it. I'm not overly emotionally invested in this race, but  I have been telling all my PT clients and new gym members that I'm doing Yeppoon, I've bought airfares and entered the race, I've been training for months, I've jacked up a cheap cabin to share with another athlete in my squad, I've booked time off work, I'm refusing to sell my bike pod even though I need the money...get the picture?

The other half of this stupid state I think I can put down to fear - of failure, of success, of jellyfish, of rain, of crashing off the bike, of bonking and not finishing, of the pain after the race, of injury, of finishing, of not making the cut-off times, of not getting an official time, of my cleats and pedals, of aerobars, of my shoulder letting me down on race day, of my knees letting me down on race day, of my tailbone letting me down on race day, of me letting me down on race day, of my bike being left on a tarmac somewhere - the list goes on!

Many of these fears I can do something about - e.g. wearing my wetsuit to ward off jellies, training hard so that I can finish the race, doing time trials to make sure I can meet the cut off times, practising my clip in and de-cleat, doing my physio exercises, practising my nutrition, spending more time in the saddle, getting better knicks so my butt doesn't get so cranky, my shitty attitude right now, etc. 

Things I can't do anything about:

Rain, post-race pain, crashing on the bike course, the airline screwing with transporting my bike, jellyfish presence, race day conditions that are outside my control, etc.

I've been working like crazy for the past couple of weeks, picking up every extra hour / PT client / shift I can get my hands on. I've done mystery shopping, attended market research focus groups, cashed in airpoints for vouchers, and drunk instant coffee instead of espresso. I've not bought any magazines this month, I've not had a meal out and I've hardly left the house except for work and runs and bike rides. 

I'm also about to start a couple of direct selling opportunities, to try and get some eggs out of the fitness basket and into other baskets! I should also find a couple of dogs to walk for a nominal fee, or some pamphlets to deliver, or something to encourage me to do more foot km! I did walk/run from work to Southern Cross today, the long way, which was about 6km.

Why all this fiscal craziness? Because money is tight and my savings have finally run out. I've come to the realisation that my reality cheque has been cashed and it's time to knuckle down. I'm not earning megabucks anymore, and if I take a day off now I don't get paid for it. The cat refuses to get a job and I'll be damned if I'm getting a second job this side of Yeppoon. If I do, I'll have less time to train. It's bad enough that I have to go to NZ for three days and not get paid for the time off. That following fortnight is going to be VERY lean!

So my best hope is doing more PT off shift, and more evening work so that I still have at least half the day left to train during the week. I need to start building up reserves for the NZ trip, for Yeppoon and for Taupo. I've got a a few things to buy this side of Yeppoon (new cleats and pedals, aeros, etc).

Time to sleep - another day tomorrow and I'm meeting the whipper snapper for a ride at 9am.

Training, pain and freezing cold

Yesterday I did the whole three-hour shebang on the bike. I was meant to ride in the morning, but slept in and by the time I had breakfast, did the dishes, tidied the house, did the washing, ate lunch and got my bike off the mag trainer, it was 3pm. Day off? Pah!

I headed over towards Williamstown, on the shared bike/foot paths. It was great - a really nice ride with nice scenery. It wasn't too easy or too hard, with a serious headwind on the way back. I had to stop in Willy and get my tyres pumped up, because I rode all the way over with a low back tyre! No wonder it felt hard and was pretty slow. It was also kinda bouncy going over bumps!

Here's some scenery:

Sunset, looking back towards the city from just past Cresser Reserve 

The path around Willy Beach was concrete tiles, with constant bumps - I suspect between this, riding over bluestone pavers and being in the saddle for hours; it mimics the road surface around Yeppoon. I'm from NZ, so I'm used to nasty volcanic chip roads - but apparently Yeppoon gives even that a run for it's money. Should make for an interesting 90km or so I think. I need to map out yesterday's ride and see how far I went.

Aussie Pukekos - not sure what they're called over here.

I got my two hours done, with three laps of the old Williamstown racecourse included. I chased a guy on a mountain bike for a while, which helped me forget that my saddle was sore (LOL). I got home, had some crackers and a cup of soup, got changed and headed to the club for the mag trainer session my coach wanted me to do. 

After some technical issues with trainer skewers not locking and my bike (and me) falling off the mag trainer (not my fault!) I did half the session before my quads packed up with lactic acid burning a hole in my legs. Not fun! I tried to take on fluids and a gel and pedal at about 80 with no gear, but it was agonising. Next week, I'll do the morning ride early as, then go do the washing and cleaning, then do the mag trainer after a nap!  I think it was too much too close together yesterday.

I also tried my first Kakadu plum marinated skippy steak yesterday. I didn't think very much of it - not sure what I was expecting, but it just didn't rock my world. The cat ended up with the rest, which she threw around outside for a while before turning her nose up at it. Clearly it didn't rock her world either.

The shoulder has been good for the past few days, but was aching like mad yesterday on the bike. I did some triceps work, TRX incline rows, rotator cuff exercises and such like on Friday, and by Saturday my shoulder felt good. I think the TRX rows loosened up my pecs and traps a bit, which is always handy, but my delts hurt today along with my traps. I'll do some more upper body stuff today before work, to get it all moving again.  I'll try and get back in the pool next week, and will continue with the cuff exercises. Hopefully I can start swimming again properly, and soon!

It's really cold here at the moment. Apparently some nasty weather system has blown off Antarctica and hit us head on. It's definitely two-jacket weather, and I'm wearing two long sleeve tops, a hoodie, two beanies (one icebreaker double layer reversible merino skullcap and one lambswool), bed socks and slippers with my compression tights and trackies - and I could probably do with a blankie over my legs! We had the coldest overnight May temperature in three years this week, and guess what Kiwis, it's coming your way, so don't laugh at me just yet!

Time for a boiling hot shower and some lunch, then a nice three-train journey to work (thanks Metro Trains, I love wasting half a day getting to work on three trains because you can't run a piss up in a brewery).

Ciao.